What to Expect Postpartum: Interview with 3 Moms about the '4th Trimester'

In this episode I interview 3 moms about what it is truly like in the postpartum period. 

Rightly so, there has been a push to recognize the postpartum period as its own trimester full of new experiences both good and bad. 
I speak to these moms about what they experienced including depression, breastfeeding and bonding issues. 

We also touch on how long their postpartum period lasts for THEM! Is it more than the standard 6 weeks you hear from your doctor? Listen to find out!

Transcript

spk_1:   0:00
Hey, guys, Welcome to another episode of four vaginas on Lee. I am Dr Celestine, your host, and in this episode, we're gonna be talking about the postpartum experience and you're not just gonna hear it from me. I've interviewed three separate women, all different age groups, all different timelines of their pregnancy and different types of pregnancies talking about their experience and what we now refer to as the fourth trimester or the postpartum period after having a baby. Not only do I talk about the one thing that surprised them about pregnancy and the postpartum experience, but we also talk about the toughest part of their experience for them individually, because everybody is a little bit different. And it includes things like breastfeeding issues and postpartum depression issues. So let's get into the music. And then we'll talk a little bit more about the episode in a second. Hello and welcome to four vaginas. Only the podcast about everything. Female. I'm your host, Dr Celestine, bringing you important information about understanding your health and body in the way you wish your doctor would actually explain it. All right, so let's get right into it. I've recorded three super interviews with three separate women that have delivered babies over different time periods and have had very different experiences. Now. I did this speak for many reasons, one, because I feel like the fourth trimester is becoming more and more important. The postpartum period, you know, we're realizing is actually something that we need to address. Many things happen in that time period, and you'll hear these women talk about what they went through. Some had great experiences. Some did not. But I'm hoping that listening to them you'll feel like you're experience is not on Lee your own. You're not by yourself. Many women experience many different ranges of things in the postpartum period, and it's important to talk about not only on this podcast episode, but with your significant other with your support system and also with your doctor. So take

spk_0:   2:04
a

spk_1:   2:04
listen and what they went through. I apologize. The quality of the sound is a little bit lower than we're used to, because I did recorded these with people that are in different areas than where I live. So the quality of sound is not great. But, you know, I think the information is important, so take the time to listen to it and let me know what you guys think. Okay, so the way that this episode's gonna be laid out, I'm just gonna go into one interview to the next interview to the next interview. But I'm gonna do an overall introduction of each of the women right now. So the first is Jeanette. Now her experience is interesting because she is also an OBE. Joanne. So I trained in residency with her, and I think it's interesting hearing in, oh, bees experience with pregnancy for the first time and how things that we always thought just because we've observed other women in pregnancy and in the postpartum period is not exactly how it goes down. So she's pretty riel and talks about her experiences in a candid way. The second interview is with Kate, and her interview is eye opening and great because she talks about her issues with breastfeeding and postpartum depression. Postpartum mood changes, postpartum blues. Um, I'll talk a little bit more on the instagram page of four vaginas on Lee at four vaginas only about the difference between all of those diagnoses and her interviews. Also interesting because it took her a long time to feel like herself again. And I'll let her explain that a little bit more once you listen to her interview and the last interview is with Lisa. So hers is interesting because she had a few C sections. The 1st 2 were vaginal deliveries in the postpartum period, so she talks a little bit about the recovery for that. But not only that, but feeling how having a C section, at least at the time of her 1st 1 she didn't really feel like she did her job because she didn't have a vaginal delivery, and that kind of carried over into her postpartum experience as well. So take a listen to all of these three women. You know, I feel like a lot of you out there can identify with them, at least on some level. And even if you're not pregnant yet, it gives you a little bit of an idea of what goes down not only in the later stages of pregnancy but after the delivery. I think the overarching theme is that you need a support system so each one of these women talk about how having a support system helped them get through what they were going through. And, you know, that's the unifying theme here. And I feel like that's the overarching theme of pregnancy and delivery and the postpartum period for almost every woman that I know and that I see in my practice. So I hope you guys enjoy this and let me know what you guys think. You can write some comments at four vaginas only on Instagram and Facebook. Also feel free to direct message me. I like interacting with you guys on there and let's get into it with the first interview with Jeanette.

spk_0:   5:05
Thanks for letting me interview today. Uh, Herbie out there. This is Jeanette. We trained together in residency, and she's a new mom, so I thought I would talk to her and give you guys a perspective a little bit on. You know what it is in the post partum time period. Especially even from like, it will be joy and perspective, which I would love to do myself, but I don't have any Children yet, so All right, so first question is, how long ago did you deliver? How old is your baby now?

spk_3:   5:33
He is 3.5 months old, but he's got the size of a six month old. Yeah, So 3.5 months ago.

spk_0:   5:38
Okay? Yeah. So fresh. Kill me. Feel kind of in that post partum period ish. I mean, even though we saved, like, six weeks after some people are saying it's even longer. So how was your delivery? How is, like, the experience of delivering in general and for those out there? I know before she mentions it, but it's gonna be It's gonna sound super simple and easy. Not every deliveries like this that wasn't to you. Be well, Yeah. Okay. Compared to the things we've seen, it could be a lot worse. So just you know, in your opinion. And, you know, for the mothers out there, they'll have delivery somewhere to yours. How is your delivery?

spk_3:   6:15
My delivery was fantastic. Leading up to the delivery wasn't too long about 11 hour labor and my water broke. I was having some mild contractions, but I know what you already owe some money. Go to the hospital. I wasn't too uncomfortable. I could handle contractions. I was in good shape. That's a hospital. The one centimeter My doctor gave you Potosi, which makes my contracting stronger. And it's Susan. Dr Witelson, I was like a raggedy mess. I need that epidural now. Like so excruciating. Felt like someone was literally tearing my fellas apart.

spk_0:   6:48
How centimeters were you by the time you got your epidural?

spk_3:   6:51
I was still one centimeter, So I was pretty good at pain, and, you know, you see, wouldn't contract like, Okay, this is painful, but we actually feel that contraction pain. It's like, Lord help me, I could also every woman who's ever had a natural delivery with no epidural. I did not do that. The best decision of my life. I kind of tried to sleep throughout the night, but I was listening to the heart rate because, you know, I was in over a year, like, super to you. Like what? My thing is hardly doing. Yeah. So relax. Relax, Relax. And then later progress Pretty quickly. I was fully dilated, ready to push. I pushed like three contractions and being was out.

spk_0:   7:31
Did you have any tears?

spk_3:   7:32
I did. I had a second degree. The last I didn't feel any of it. I said anything when I was pushing me to tell a patient to push you push down, but look like you're having about him and try to push down there. Thinks I'm like we're exactly Am I okay? I think I mean, at least feel, you know, You know, my doctor down below. I feel something. I don't believe it. It was interesting. Yeah, but that's a little push. Pretty well.

spk_0:   7:55
If you don't think you're pushing, you are pushing for most of the time. Yeah. So, uh oh. I mean, pretty good Delivery. Pretty status quo. Yeah. Yeah. Let's just get

spk_3:   8:07
an epidural. Lasted throughout the entire night. Um, so I was comfortable, at least with that first night next morning, however, but a

spk_0:   8:16
little war off first pain or discomfort that you started to feel like in your first part of your post part of here.

spk_3:   8:25
I felt like the swelling down below my plenty. Um, sit down. He was like, You're sitting on a big, like school and cushion. Yeah. It was just like, Whoa, this is really uncomfortable. I think the motion motion help a little bit, but that was part of the first discomfort I felt. And then the second was probably after a rest, like right afterwards. Cramping, contraction, like feeling of the uterus. Um, that was a little more that was not too painful, but surprisingly more uncomfortable, I thought would be

spk_0:   8:54
more comfortable in, like, a bad period. Cram for

spk_3:   8:57
that. So you don't get many, like much cramping with my periods. Um, but yeah, I would imagine a bad period camp. All

spk_0:   9:04
right, So what is? Well, let's sit too much and breastfeeding. Let's talk about any breast feeding issues that you had. Did you have any issues with that at all?

spk_3:   9:13
I did, cause he would lash to one side better than the other. Yeah, preferably preferentially. Put him on that side all the time. But the lactation consultants came in postpartum, which was nice, and they taught me how to lack howto hold him properly on the other side. Another fact. So that was fine. The only problem I had was well for trucks and say, My mom was there with me. It's almost like when I was pregnant with you guys and I delivered to you. I produced enough milk to feed a village. You know, I had all this excess milk. I'm Michael Mosley. That's good for you. Great. He needed four ounces producing four outs, keeping that are trying to keep up. But I was also not a publicist. Supplementing of formula. Did you? Yeah, I did. Especially in the first few weeks are really supplemented at night just to kind of get him to sleep on throughout the day. At least give him mostly all breast milk. I'm not being about happened half, half dressed. Um okay,

spk_0:   10:12
what are your plans for rescuing a planet to do the recommended six months and when it will be on that? So, ideally, I

spk_3:   10:17
would've like I like to do six months. Okay. When I first thought I wanted to breastfeed, um, I was thinking I was gay myself, like, two weeks like a trial period. Because you see, Mom supposed part of everybody's all stressed about breast feeding, and he's like, it's not going the way they want it to. And it speaks more anxiety of anything. I'm so I like kind of set the bar a little low for myself to start with. No one will disappoint myself, hating someone myself onto something. If I don't reach that bar, I'm just you know, I'm okay with giving formula,

spk_0:   10:48
which I think is good, cause some moms like they put so much emphasis on breast feeding and then when they're not able to or when they stop short and they want to there, like in distress.

spk_3:   10:57
Right? And I was like, I'm not gonna be that person. I don't know you have, but it actually working out better than I thought it's gonna be, So I'm gonna try to continue. At least I'm starting work tomorrow. Someone tried to at least give him some breast milk up until six months. That's only about 2.5 months left. But obviously, I'm gonna have to give him a little formula wanted throughout the day.

spk_0:   11:19
So we know that breastfeeding is super important. The milk is super nutritious. It's great for babies. But for those that can't do it because of work or because they're not producing, you know, it's it's not even in the world. Your baby will still be okay. That inside temples This there Yeah, over

spk_3:   11:34
that. I'm found surprising about breast feeding. Yeah, my mom also warned me about how painful lose

spk_0:   11:41
you feel like it is that I always hear is painful if the baby's not latching appropriately, even if they

spk_3:   11:47
are lashing appropriately, It's like they have teeth. Unless you just had a very strong section. But it literally feels like they're gnawing at your nipple. Really? Yes, yes. And my mom before that before delivered. She's Theis. Mom is dining Is Arnold Noble Island thing, Our Caribbean thing? She's a He had the recipe nipple before you delivers,

spk_0:   12:10
I mean, even with me to have callouses on my rectum up. But I regret not

spk_3:   12:16
doing it because it was definitely bangle.

spk_0:   12:20
I don't want to hurt the most. Could you see people doing it on the subway or in public? And they don't let their in pain?

spk_3:   12:25
No. When you get used to it with the first, like, few weeks.

spk_0:   12:28
So I say

spk_3:   12:28
in dusted to it, it's cables appointment. They're like, you know, go to believe like,

spk_0:   12:33
Oh, all right. Well, that's good to know. I had no idea about that

spk_3:   12:37
s o way. Beware.

spk_0:   12:40
Yeah. No, I don't think I was gonna ask you about postpartum depression. It's just like a general question. I don't think you had any, Did you?

spk_3:   12:47
I didn't have postpartum depression. I think mostly because I had my mom and my grandmother. Well, time like the Calvary, you know, help me.

spk_0:   12:55
The support system is very important for that poor

spk_3:   12:57
thing I would have had, at least in postpartum blues or something, if I was there about myself. Right? The house, Um, because I'm not one to sit still at all. As you know, I'm always out doing something family. You know, the only friends I don't like state in the house all the time with baby by myself, because it's literally 24 7 You know, you have no time for yourself. You wanted everything. Pre baby mission babies. Welcome and comfortable, not crying. And by the time you do ask you to some of the stuff days over and at home, by yourself, through all that all the time you're going if we lose yourself, just at least have another adult in the house or another person. So just talk to or, like, go for walks with is I think is help holds a cup combatant. Postpartum depression, postpartum blues. You asked if I was lucky to have you know

spk_0:   13:46
there to, like, put the load on a little bit when you wanted a break.

spk_3:   13:50
Sure. And my husband back to work like a week after I delivered. Literally been basically a single mom at home. There's people there to help Frannie's even let them help. You know what else?

spk_0:   14:06
I think that's pretty good advice. I mean, we always asked, like, you know, you have a good support system, that whole. But like I think before you actually go through it, you don't realize how important it is. Especially for that, like, postpartum period,

spk_3:   14:18
when you have a brand new baby, right? She is huge. Yeah, is I didn't realize how I don't like this one. How tired. I wasn't me either. Yeah, we were. Residents were used to being, you

spk_0:   14:29
know, sleep. Sleep deprivation. Right is a

spk_3:   14:33
whole nother level. That's the deprivation.

spk_0:   14:35
So do you feel like you're back to normal yet? Yes. Amen. And he started to feel that,

spk_3:   14:43
um, visibly vaccine. What? I think I probably looked back. I've looked more than normal. Look normal earlier than I felt normal.

spk_0:   14:51
All right. What then? Well, I don't mean I just mean like, feeling like yourself again.

spk_3:   14:54
My totally out problem stayed closer to, like, eight weeks maybe. Yeah, um, like, emotionally, like getting a rhythm to things breaking out have, like, do think for myself like hand, baby. Also, go wash my hair or something. Go on, go to the gym. You know, get a routine so that I felt like I was still me also, you know, also my first, like 6 96 Yeah. 68 weeks or so. You're still, like, trying to get a pattern like baby you know so rapidly and you try to keep up with them that, you know, you only have time to kind of figure out what you need to do for yourself. Oh, you know, seals. Yeah, I would say closing 88 minutes or so. Yeah.

spk_0:   15:37
Yeah. Okay, so the very last question would you kind of answer some stuff like along the way. But is there anything else that, like, you know, as an overdue? And you feel like you were surprised about when it came to either pregnancy delivery or postpartum really? Like anything? Because we always like feeling We know what it is. And we see so many pregnant women doing it that way. We have, like, a full graph on what is gonna be like? And I'm sure that that's not the case.

spk_3:   16:05
Well, being pregnant was much less fun than I thought It was gonna be a ride in the park or bread, but it's not comfortable. Especially in elite. They're German. Sir, please have patience That comes in office at, like, 34 weeks. And I'm like, get this baby out of me. I'm done with,

spk_0:   16:22
like, you have a reason to you at least full term. Just hold on

spk_3:   16:26
a couple more weeks. Um, but no, I understand exactly what either I had to drop it like a side of 34 weeks because by that, he liked Can't bend over to tie your shoe properly Or, you know, you can't relate uncomfortably on the on the bed. You have to kind of get momentum to rule yourself out of a bit. You know, it's like there's a lot more comfortable. I thought somebody for sure. Yeah, And then that contract in payment told you,

spk_0:   16:49
Right? Right, Right. That's totally different than what you think. You actually sent my husband's and it kind of anesthesiologists always like you better put the epidural before we even leave the house because I just you know what it feels like? I could see their faces, and I have a feeling it's bad. Oh, it's not

spk_3:   17:05
that I could get an epidural with Not as bad as

spk_0:   17:08
those no contraction pains. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Kudos that anyone like you said before that did it without an epidural. I have never done it, but I've seen people do it and I just can't even imagine.

spk_3:   17:20
Yeah, me either. Yeah. Slippery of us in us, too. Another poll of different level of respect. Yeah.

spk_1:   17:30
Now let's talk to

spk_0:   17:31
Kate. My 1st 1 should you is when or how long ago did you deliver?

spk_2:   17:39
So I delivered. It's almost been 14 months.

spk_0:   17:44
I was just gonna ask if you feel like you're back to your old self again, or do you feel like you'll never be yourself again? Or how do you feel overall, in the postpartum aspect? Uh,

spk_2:   17:56
I definitely feel a lot more like before. Um, I became pregnant, but it took a while to get to here, mainly because I did have a little tiny bit of postpartum depression on and off. And this is probably the first time that I'm feel I'm not really feeling that anymore. But ah, you know, after about three months of breast feeding and pumping, I pretty much said I couldn't do it anymore. It just was a lot harder, way harder than I thought it wasa and I knew it was gonna be hard. So

spk_0:   18:36
yeah. So what do you think is the hardest part in that? That people might not realize

spk_2:   18:42
when your milk comes in your I mean, they talk about in gorge mint that there needs to be another term almost because, like, they're they're rock mine were rocks and And when I would get a clogged duct, which was pretty much on and off for the full three months, I couldn't think about anything else but getting out of pain. So and you have toe work to unclog one poor and then another border. It's like all around her entire, entire boob, though. Yeah, thanks. Um, that was Griff's list. So

spk_0:   19:23
yeah, I also hear a lot of people, you know, they say it's like a full time jobs. You know, you have to pump like, every two or three hours. You know, your words hop bad or even just taking care of the baby. It's hard to do that like a problem Skin breast fee.

spk_2:   19:36
It's very, very difficult. So that part I underestimated somehow, even though everyone told me, you know So But

spk_0:   19:46
then tell me a little bit about the postpartum, like mood changes that you were having. When did they start?

spk_2:   19:54
Um, I think a lot of that waas affected by the fact that I wasn't successful with breast feeding. Um, I had to use a nipple shield and the lactation consultants that I had after the hospital the one I had in the hospital was great. She gave me the shield and said, Look, you might have to use this, And so when I went to see lactation consultants after, uh, a couple days after we left the hospital, they were the complete opposite and just were like, We're gonna get you off of the shield. You're gonna be successful without it and just put a lot of pressure on me to not use it. So when I that was the only thing I could use to get her toe latch, Um, so

spk_0:   20:41
who don't know what the nipple shield is? What is that?

spk_2:   20:45
So Basically, when you can't get your nipples to come out far enough to feed the baby for the baby to latch, you get this little silicone cover that has holes in it that gets the baby the latch easier. So,

spk_0:   21:01
yeah, And then when you came out of the hospital, omit those lactation consultants after they kind of discouraged you from using it. Did you try to still use it, or were you trying to follow their directions?

spk_2:   21:12
No. I try to still use it. I pretty much after that meeting with them. I said,

spk_0:   21:17
I don't think I

spk_2:   21:18
want to go back to them. The first lactation consultant was much better being more open with Here. Try this. You know, other people are gonna maybe trying to get you to not use it. Just use what works. So I tried that and then, you know, proceeded to get all these clogged ducks. Um, it was pretty much borderline mast itis for three months and then had to go to work, though I purposely dried up.

spk_0:   21:48
Yeah. What did you do to dry up

spk_2:   21:51
lettuce? Yeah, lettuce. It it sounds weird. And I don't I don't really know why it It's, um you know, drives you up, but you just pump enough out to get it comfortable while you're engorged and they slowly, slowly comes away. So yeah, yeah,

spk_0:   22:11
say the cold lettuce And like, the compress, it kind of put lettuce like in the broad like you but compressed type Ross of the coldness press. The compression starts to decrease the output of the milk, so that's kind of how it works.

spk_2:   22:23
I was thankful for that, cause I once I decided that I was going to do it. I said, I'm just Yeah, I can't do this with working and just isn't Yeah, work. So

spk_0:   22:35
just funny. I don't hear this stuff with my patient that a lot of people assume that I know things about breast feeding, which I do like the basics or know about peace. But I don't know as much as no Cree attrition would or a mom. What? I haven't been a bomb, you know, a nice kind of hear from other people.

spk_2:   22:52
Oh, yeah. No, I wish more people had been like, Hey, look, you may have to feed your baby like leaning over, you know, like, dangle your boobs. So now I know.

spk_0:   23:03
Once you have decided Thio stop breastfeeding. Do you still feel like you had that, like, postpartum depression symptoms? And what kind of symptoms were you having?

spk_2:   23:13
Um, it was depression because I, you know, was really gung ho that I was going to be good at breastfeeding for at least six months, maybe longer. And so when I didn't even, you know, I got halfway to my, you know, initial goal. It was just kind of like, you're not a good mother, You know, you aren't feeding your child with the best stuff that there is, But eventually, and I think it took me Probably when she was done with, Formulated to move on and say, OK, it's done. She's fine. You know, it is one of the less recent. Yeah, yeah, you know.

spk_0:   23:52
Wow. Did you have that? Makes a lot of people will, you know, like not just the thoughts of feeling inadequate. It's what they're looking at least, but, like, they have crying episodes, you know, breakdowns, anxiety. Did you experience any of that?

spk_2:   24:06
Yeah. And unfortunately, there were times when I felt overwhelmed. So I get upset and I would take it out on Scott. So, uh, he was a trooper to deal with that As long as he did, That's Ah, yeah, It came and went. It was very strange. So

spk_0:   24:26
yeah. Yeah. So now you've only probably had just a few months of just feeling back, Thio your prior cell.

spk_2:   24:34
Yeah. Yeah, it took a while. I really thought, you know, one side had everything from, you know, switching of the formula. Okay. You know, I I'm okay. It's not what I wanted, but she's being fed. But it took longer after that for it to really be like, Okay, it's clicked back now, so yeah.

spk_0:   24:54
Yeah, that's crazy. I think the interviewed one is that it felt like back to herself immediately after the other was mostly because of the C section. And like, recovering from that, uh, had a vaginal delivery. Pretty like a pretty uncomplicated vaginal delivery, as far as I remember.

spk_2:   25:13
Um, it was all of

spk_0:   25:14
your stuff. Yeah, but all your stuff kind of hit you after

spk_2:   25:17
you did it. And I wasn't a ging it too. So I kind of threw me for a loop, but right. Yeah, we're out. We know, since he's older I'm like, Okay. I'm good.

spk_0:   25:27
Yeah. Yeah. So is one thing that you would kind of tell expecting moms, too. I don't know. So that they can maybe not go through some of the things you went through or just some encouraging words for that. What do you think is one of the most important things to know is my question.

spk_2:   25:46
Um, trust your instinct. Don't let their people influence your decisions about your child. And, um, you know, if you need help, you need to tell someone, you know, don't Don't expect them to see it. You need to tell them. So those were for my experiences, anyway, to help me.

spk_0:   26:09
Yeah, it takes a team. I think it was in the beginning. And a new mom too. Just, like raise a baby and to go through all of that. So yeah, I think

spk_2:   26:17
that's pretty cool. Yeah.

spk_1:   26:21
Okay, guys. Now let's get into our last interview with Lisa today. I have Lisa here, and she's a mom of three boys, and she actually had three C sections. So quite a different experience in a vaginal delivery. And she's had a How long ago was your last child born Let's start with that. Four years ago, four years ago. So Ah, lot of experience. So I figured I would talk to her a little bit about what she went through to give you guys kind of a different look as to two different ways of to deliver and two different pregnancies altogether. So we could talk about that a little bit. Okay, So why did you have your first C section? The baby was just in distress. He had pooped in me. And when he was just all the numbers were going down s so it was just a quick decision. And I never dreamed that I would have had had a c section. So that wasn't your plan at all. We talked about that. Where it never crossed my mind. Yeah. Yeah. How dilated were you by the time they did the c section? Probably not two or 30 How long were you in the hospital before? About eight hours. Like they're about to my water broken home about to. And then he was out about, like, 10. 30 that morning. Okay. Yeah, That's a whole long experience. Yeah, And then your next tour just scheduled. Yes, okay? They were out. 2nd 1 was due to insurance, and my doctor couldn't deliver, so they had to get special privileges. So we just went ahead with the delivery Percy section. Yeah. And the 3rd 1 You know why not? It is a terrible recovery, though, under that, because watching my friends go to working out, like, immediately after, and you work out a lot. So it's hard for someone that actually not. Yeah, it is a harder recovery. Is it? Because sometimes I would tell people six weeks, but sometimes it takes even longer to recover. Switch if you've had multiple C sections. Did have very good recoveries. Very good pregnancy. As but was it harder to recover from the last C section that it was the first? No. I mean, I just think they're all it's about a week, a week of pain. You just go with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you get a two bullet? Can't remember. Yes. With the last one that I did have a doable. Yeah, Take care of. All

spk_0:   28:38
right.

spk_1:   28:39
So, um, I guess I mean, since you've had a few kids, I don't want to really talk about one pregnancy versus the other. But just like in general. So were there any that you know of any complications with your surgeries? No. Well, with the 1st 1 I had allergic reaction to something. We don't know what, but I had to end up going back in because us my whole face. Well, it's like a sumo wrestler. It was. It was an interesting at 1st 1 Well, yeah, interesting. But everything else was kind of status quo. So multiple we're doing today. That's just a little background on, like, you know, your deliveries. But most of what we're talking about postpartum and the postpartum experience. Because this whole thing now with the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology that talks about the fourth trimester, which is an important parts, the postpartum period, it's recovering from the delivery. It's trying to establish your household with a new child. New baby. It's, you know, there's lots of stuff kind of wrapped into that. So my first official question along that lines is, Was there something about the postpartum period that you were surprised about? That you no one told you ahead of time? I just for me with my 1st 1 was I just felt like I didn't do my job, so that was, like, the hardest thing to wrap my mind around. But, you know, get had a C section. Not a vaginal right from one. Like nobody ever told me about it. I mean, we never talked about it. Like it could be a possibility. I just feel like, you know, it was yeah. So just having a c section in general with surprising Yeah. Yeah. I think that rocked my world. Yeah, which is funny, I would think that. I mean, I usually talk about with everybody, you know, because it's always something that's on the table because we never know how things are gonna go. Yeah, so all right. And then So how long did it take you to go back to normal? I know you said six weeks, but you truly feel like your body, your mind, Everything was kind of back to normal in six weeks. Or how long do you think that takes? Well, yes, I do. Because you're getting into a good routine. You're getting to know each other. Thankfully, I had 12 weeks to adjust. That's nice. And that that last six weeks really, really does help. Yeah. Yeah. Did your husband get any, like, paternity leave at all? He I think he could have. Yeah, definitely. Did not take that. I needed to, like, you know, get in my routine. You know, because you're breastfeeding, Ray. And it's not like they can really do anything. Yeah, but I mean, I would think, especially once you have two other little ones and you bring home 1/3 little one. Yeah, that your needs some type of help. If it was just like, yeah, and not, you know, about very fortunate. Mom has always been there. That's what I'm gonna ask you. Anybody else? There has always been there, at least for a week. And I remember thinking with the last one, like, I was just ready for everyone to leave because I knew what I needed to be ableto handle it. All right. I needed to see if I was capable of killing three kids. So it was like that was a type of anxiety and yeah, freaking out. But you just you just do it. Get your routine. You do it. I mean, our everything with my third and what have I done to my family. I was like, whatever. I can't control anyone. Yeah, I still can't. Well, better about accepting that now. Three kids is definitely hard. Um, but, you know, it's kind of like a loving, hectic nest. Maybe everyone is different, because when you go to having one, your world is rocked for it. And then, too, it's just a different, Like you've had kids, but, you know, like, I think every you're gonna have a different anxiety. Different? Yeah, feeling about every birth. Did you ever have any issues with postpartum depression or anything like that after delivery? No. I mean, I felt like I could get the baby blues, but really, like getting out and walking outside definitely would always help, Even if it was just, like, just by yourself. Yes, with the baby. Okay, just push the baby in the stroller. You know, I had them all in one month's, so that was helpful. Thankfully, never had to deal with the winter winter, baby. Okay. And then I'm assuming that also having your mom, they're kind of helps battle any type of anxieties or depression that you might feel because you have somebody there to kind of help you out. And yes, because she's doing more like household chores, right? Say, and that because when you have all that building up on top of, like, trying to, like, clean bottles and whatever pumps things had to pump with every single one of mine that way, that could have, like, I really wanted to do that. So I think that helped take away pumping, like supplementing with breast feeding or just pumping. Hey, they wouldn't. My 1st 2 would not attack. Okay, so I pumped around the clock. Okay, so I mean, it's it's it's a lot of work, and I think like that took a lot of attention to being like I could have been frustrated had been there with the 1st 1 So you know that that help? Yeah. You just get through it. Yeah. A lot of people have difficulty with breastfeeding, and that's a big challenge in the postpartum. Furious. I can I can totally see that. Yeah, Yeah. Some people there, baby, doesn't they don't latch at all. Some people, they're not even able to develop milk. And I know how you said you felt you were doing your job because you had a C section. Some people also relate to me that they don't think they're doing their job because they can't produce milk or they can't breast be properly. So there's lots of anxiety in that. But I mean, you have three kids. They're, you know, a little bit older than we talked to Jeanette earlier. Hers is a brand new baby. So you kind of have, like, you know, older kids. And do you feel like even though you went through all that, even though you kind of felt at some points like things were crazy, that everything turned out okay in the end? Always. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because I have a lot of people come to me just with anxiety, and they just feel like because they're not doing their job. Their kid's not gonna grow up, you know, as it should. And then, you know, when you say not doing your job like society thinks like it's all everybody's family is different, right? So, you know, some people adopt some, but like you don't think about that like, I don't think about those deliveries and not being able to, like, push it out like it doesn't haunt me because I'm just gonna make sure I didn't forget my kid. Yeah. At school, every step I feel has a new hurdle. You know, you can't do on the past too much. You got to keep moving forward. Yeah, this kind of, ah, off topic question. But a lot of people want to know what they should bring to the hospital. So have you ever do any advice, sir? Those that had C sections or might have C sections. Something that might help them in the hospital. Comfy clothes. I like the big down wear breast fed like a good big breastfeeding gown. Is nothing attractive about it. Yeah, but, I mean, just the looser, the better. Yeah. Yeah. You're Bobby's Always good. Oh, yeah. A lot of people have those. Yeah, but I feel like I'm so outdated. No, it is going on in the times. Yeah. I mean, I just so fast. Yeah, that there's new Even I was seeing. There's products now, kits that people are making and selling to bring to the hospital for vaginal deliveries or C sections of things like that. So that times are changing and changing everything. Yeah, um and then if you were to give advice to any mom out there in the post partum period. Okay. What do you think it would be? Just talk. Talk to someone. Tell him what you're thinking. That I mean, that helps out tremendously just to get those thoughts out of your yeah, brain. You know, like, I think that's a good tool to try toe have a good support team. Yeah, even if it's your physician, talk to someone. But hopefully someone will listen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's important. Because you can't. I mean, that's just everyday life, too. You can't just stay in your head all the time, right? Yeah. And it's harder when you, you know, have a kid you're trying to write, adjust and find that time to talk to someone besides a fit that doesn't talk back. Yeah. Yeah, that's it. That's it. As always. Thank you guys. So much for listening. I'm not gonna make this episode any longer than it already is. You know where to catch me At four vaginas only on Instagram Facebook for vaginas. Only dot com. Send me email. Semi direct messages. Would love to hear what you guys think about this episode. Find out a little bit more about the postpartum period at the four vaginas only Instagram page and I will see you guys soon in the next episode. But by